Energy Drinks

For reasons that are none of your business, I have recently been sampling every energy drink on the market.  Red Bull. Monster. Rock Star. Red Rain.  They can it, I drink it.  I have arrived at two ineffable conclusions:  1) They taste exactly the same and 2) Their only active ingredient is caffeine.  
 

The options on the energy drink shelves in America’s supermarkets and 7-11 refrigerators is sorely lacking.  We need more of these damn things to choose from.  Here are my product ideas – names and copy ripped right from the side of the can.